Remembering Alan Hans, DVM
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We gathered at the Woodstock Jewish Congregation last Sunday and grieved together. Not really. We were, actually, each in a separate bubble, remembering Alan.Hans
The Rabbi sang prayers a capella. The crowded room included family and friends, community members, employees, and others.
We each felt special. We each felt a unique connection to the memory of Alan Hans. Several individuals spoke – each person relating what she felt was a “secret” experience shared with Alan Hans..
These short, shared stories made the guests feel more comfortable with the person who had a larger-than-life connection to his community. Guests felt a sense of togetherness in the moment.
This energy shift was important to the grief experience.
Really, Dr. Alan Hans was much more than the father, uncle, friend, veterinarian, employer. He gave character, strength, and color to a group of people who call Woodstock, NY, home.
Throughout his career in Woodstock and Port Ewen, I don’t think Dr. Hans sought his place in the community. He just settled into this spot…through his daily connections with people in the community.
During the service, a few people sat alone, on the back row or along the wall. They were as close to invisible as they could get. The grief was overwhelming.
I think that happens in situations like this. .People are recognized – family, friends, neighbors.
But, when the deceased honoree is a person of the community – an entirely different group huddles together individually or collectively.
The situation cannot be avoided. Unless the person or persons go to the family and identify themselves, not much can be done.
They are outside the circle of family and friends but inside the circle of the community. Though often unidentified, the grief is just as deep, just as disturbing, and just as captivating.
Grief offers us an opportunity to hold and comfort each other more closely. Our remembrances are shared as treasured thoughts.
To those sitting outside the circle and along the wall, let us reach out from our hearts to yours with love, with sympathy, and with caring.
Our hearts and minds are thinking of you at this difficult time.
Thurman Greco
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